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We put ourselves on diets and 'healthy eating' to lose weight and finally wear the coveted 'size 42' (because shapes are crucial for personal life!) We sincerely believe that self-love can only be achieved through hardships and self-restriction. We reach the coveted numbers but do not become happier. Until we are thoroughly tired of it.
It's difficult for us to praise ourselves, to love, and it's difficult not to apologize for just standing here a bit…
We (completely in vain) want to be cute. Throughout our lives, we are nudged, corrected, and constantly improved. Loved ones often do this with special enthusiasm, cruelty, and zeal.
We don't know our desires. We haven't learned to feel what we want, and it manifests itself in everything, from breakfast to clothes in the fitting room. So we consult with others, does our desire have the right to exist? In the end, we want closeness and pleasure, but behave as if the main goal is to prove our 'normality.' And this is the real dysfunction — the desire to conform to an imaginary norm.
Rare moments when we are allowed to be ourselves are remembered by us forever. Experiencing this feeling, we want to return to it again and again. That's why the opportunity to share something intimate, hear something non-judgmental in return, show different parts of ourselves and not be afraid of rejection is so valuable.
In a sense, it means gaining the right to exist. Feel slightly less flawed and wrong. Perhaps it's worth starting to listen to conditional 'impulses.' Does it click or not? Is it necessary, or is it just an invention? And it turns out that feeling oneself and one's state is much more important than adhering to societal beliefs.
Perhaps, when we understand this, there will be fewer foolish encounters with unnecessary people because we will know exactly what our heart really wants, for example, a croissant…
Accept each other. At least sometimes. Because we all deserve it.
And about confident style. Underwear, for the sake of confidence, doesn't really play a significant role (some don't even wear them)
